My thoughts on travelling without kids

Woman standing with back to camera wearing a jean jacket

I did it! My husband and I left our daughter at home and went on vacation, but getting me there definitely wasn’t easy! As mamas I think we can all agree that leaving your children to go on vacation is tough. First off, you have to prep almost as much as you would if they were coming, to ensure smooth sailing for whoever is watching them. Logistics aside, you then have to mentally scramble through all the mom guilt and anxiety.

I’ve travelled without Stella three times. I’ve gone on two girls trips, and although it was hard leaving, I felt better knowing my husband was at home. Going on vacation with my husband gave me the most anxiety! What took up most of my headspace was the “what ifs”.

“What if something happens to me while I’m away and she’s left with no mom? No parents?
What if something happens to her while I’m gone? I’ll never be able to forgive myself.”

I know! I think of the worst and most extreme situations, but I can’t help it! I can’t be the only mama whose had these thoughts cross her mind, so I’ll let you judge me, but I know there’s more of you out there LOL. 

Now that I’ve gone on 3 trips sans baby I kinda feel like a vet LOL, so here are my thoughts/ tips for any mamas with a similar struggle.

  1. They’re going to be ok, I promise! Whoever you’re leaving them with will probably keep a better eye on them than you would, because they’re terrified something would happen on their watch.
  2. You need this! When I went away with my girlfriends I felt like I reconnected with a part of me that had been stuffed far back in the closet since I became a mom. Going away without your baby makes you a priority for a few days and man it feels good!
  3. You’ll be a different mama when you get back. After a few days away, I feel like I’m more patient and present. What your baby needs is a mom that’s mentally and physically healthy and happy. So, as hard as it may be, go take care of yourself! 
  4. If you’re travelling with your partner, your relationship needs this more than you know. By day 2 of our getaway I was blown away with how much I missed my husband We spend a lot of time together, yet I now realize it isn’t quality time. Our trip gave us 5 days of hanging out just like we use to; it was a little reminder of how it all began.
  5. Do it when you’re ready. Maybe it’s not until your baby is 5 or maybe it’s when your baby is 3 months old. Do what works for you and don’t let anyone make you feel bad about it. You know what’s best for yourself and your family [however I will say my husband forced me on our little getaway and I wasn’t mad about it once I got there!].

Now, this isn’t to say ditch your kids every chance you get. Travelling and spending time as a family is great. I’ve never regretted taking Stella on vacation and we’ve travelled with her quite a bit. This is just to say that if you’re even considering the idea of getting away without your babes, maybe it’s time! Take baby steps if it’s easier – a one night staycation could help you ease into it. It’s never easy [all 3 times I cried A LOT], but from my experience it’s always been really good for everyone. You got this!

XO
Caroline

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